Peeve Farm

g r o t t o 1 1

Peeve Farm
Breeding peeves for show, not just to keep as pets

Brian Tiemann
Silicon Valley-based purveyor of a confusing mixture of Apple punditry and political bile.

btman at grotto11 dot com

Read These Too:

InstaPundit
Steven Den Beste
James Lileks
Little Green Footballs
As the Apple Turns
Entropicana
Cold Fury
Capitalist Lion
Red Letter Day
Eric S. Raymond
Tal G in Jerusalem
Aziz Poonawalla
Corsair the Rational Pirate
.clue
Ravishing Light
Rosenblog
Cartago Delenda Est

Book Plugs:

Buy 'em and I get
money. I think.
BSD Mall

Amazon Honor System

12/10/2007 - 12/16/2007
12/3/2007 -  12/9/2007
11/26/2007 -  12/2/2007
11/19/2007 - 11/25/2007
11/12/2007 - 11/18/2007
11/5/2007 - 11/11/2007
10/29/2007 -  11/4/2007
10/22/2007 - 10/28/2007
10/15/2007 - 10/21/2007
10/8/2007 - 10/14/2007
10/1/2007 -  10/7/2007
9/24/2007 -  9/30/2007
9/17/2007 -  9/23/2007
9/10/2007 -  9/16/2007
  9/3/2007 -   9/9/2007
8/27/2007 -   9/2/2007
8/20/2007 -  8/26/2007
8/13/2007 -  8/19/2007
  8/6/2007 -  8/12/2007
7/30/2007 -   8/5/2007
7/23/2007 -  7/29/2007
7/16/2007 -  7/22/2007
  7/9/2007 -  7/15/2007
  7/2/2007 -   7/8/2007
6/25/2007 -   7/1/2007
6/18/2007 -  6/24/2007
6/11/2007 -  6/17/2007
  6/4/2007 -  6/10/2007
5/28/2007 -   6/3/2007
5/21/2007 -  5/27/2007
5/14/2007 -  5/20/2007
  5/7/2007 -  5/13/2007
4/30/2007 -   5/6/2007
4/23/2007 -  4/29/2007
4/16/2007 -  4/22/2007
  4/9/2007 -  4/15/2007
  4/2/2007 -   4/8/2007
3/26/2007 -   4/1/2007
3/19/2007 -  3/25/2007
3/12/2007 -  3/18/2007
  3/5/2007 -  3/11/2007
2/26/2007 -   3/4/2007
2/19/2007 -  2/25/2007
2/12/2007 -  2/18/2007
  2/5/2007 -  2/11/2007
1/29/2007 -   2/4/2007
1/22/2007 -  1/28/2007
1/15/2007 -  1/21/2007
  1/8/2007 -  1/14/2007
  1/1/2007 -   1/7/2007
12/25/2006 - 12/31/2006
12/18/2006 - 12/24/2006
12/11/2006 - 12/17/2006
12/4/2006 - 12/10/2006
11/27/2006 -  12/3/2006
11/20/2006 - 11/26/2006
11/13/2006 - 11/19/2006
11/6/2006 - 11/12/2006
10/30/2006 -  11/5/2006
10/23/2006 - 10/29/2006
10/16/2006 - 10/22/2006
10/9/2006 - 10/15/2006
10/2/2006 -  10/8/2006
9/25/2006 -  10/1/2006
9/18/2006 -  9/24/2006
9/11/2006 -  9/17/2006
  9/4/2006 -  9/10/2006
8/28/2006 -   9/3/2006
8/21/2006 -  8/27/2006
8/14/2006 -  8/20/2006
  8/7/2006 -  8/13/2006
7/31/2006 -   8/6/2006
7/24/2006 -  7/30/2006
7/17/2006 -  7/23/2006
7/10/2006 -  7/16/2006
  7/3/2006 -   7/9/2006
6/26/2006 -   7/2/2006
6/19/2006 -  6/25/2006
6/12/2006 -  6/18/2006
  6/5/2006 -  6/11/2006
5/29/2006 -   6/4/2006
5/22/2006 -  5/28/2006
5/15/2006 -  5/21/2006
  5/8/2006 -  5/14/2006
  5/1/2006 -   5/7/2006
4/24/2006 -  4/30/2006
4/17/2006 -  4/23/2006
4/10/2006 -  4/16/2006
  4/3/2006 -   4/9/2006
3/27/2006 -   4/2/2006
3/20/2006 -  3/26/2006
3/13/2006 -  3/19/2006
  3/6/2006 -  3/12/2006
2/27/2006 -   3/5/2006
2/20/2006 -  2/26/2006
2/13/2006 -  2/19/2006
  2/6/2006 -  2/12/2006
1/30/2006 -   2/5/2006
1/23/2006 -  1/29/2006
1/16/2006 -  1/22/2006
  1/9/2006 -  1/15/2006
  1/2/2006 -   1/8/2006
12/26/2005 -   1/1/2005
12/19/2005 - 12/25/2005
12/12/2005 - 12/18/2005
12/5/2005 - 12/11/2005
11/28/2005 -  12/4/2005
11/21/2005 - 11/27/2005
11/14/2005 - 11/20/2005
11/7/2005 - 11/13/2005
10/31/2005 -  11/6/2005
10/24/2005 - 10/30/2005
10/17/2005 - 10/23/2005
10/10/2005 - 10/16/2005
10/3/2005 -  10/9/2005
9/26/2005 -  10/2/2005
9/19/2005 -  9/25/2005
9/12/2005 -  9/18/2005
  9/5/2005 -  9/11/2005
8/29/2005 -   9/4/2005
8/22/2005 -  8/28/2005
8/15/2005 -  8/21/2005
  8/8/2005 -  8/14/2005
  8/1/2005 -   8/7/2005
7/25/2005 -  7/31/2005
7/18/2005 -  7/24/2005
7/11/2005 -  7/17/2005
  7/4/2005 -  7/10/2005
6/27/2005 -   7/3/2005
6/20/2005 -  6/26/2005
6/13/2005 -  6/19/2005
  6/6/2005 -  6/12/2005
5/30/2005 -   6/5/2005
5/23/2005 -  5/29/2005
5/16/2005 -  5/22/2005
  5/9/2005 -  5/15/2005
  5/2/2005 -   5/8/2005
4/25/2005 -   5/1/2005
4/18/2005 -  4/24/2005
4/11/2005 -  4/17/2005
  4/4/2005 -  4/10/2005
3/28/2005 -   4/3/2005
3/21/2005 -  3/27/2005
3/14/2005 -  3/20/2005
  3/7/2005 -  3/13/2005
2/28/2005 -   3/6/2005
2/21/2005 -  2/27/2005
2/14/2005 -  2/20/2005
  2/7/2005 -  2/13/2005
1/31/2005 -   2/6/2005
1/24/2005 -  1/30/2005
1/17/2005 -  1/23/2005
1/10/2005 -  1/16/2005
  1/3/2005 -   1/9/2005
12/27/2004 -   1/2/2004
12/20/2004 - 12/26/2004
12/13/2004 - 12/19/2004
12/6/2004 - 12/12/2004
11/29/2004 -  12/5/2004
11/22/2004 - 11/28/2004
11/15/2004 - 11/21/2004
11/8/2004 - 11/14/2004
11/1/2004 -  11/7/2004
10/25/2004 - 10/31/2004
10/18/2004 - 10/24/2004
10/11/2004 - 10/17/2004
10/4/2004 - 10/10/2004
9/27/2004 -  10/3/2004
9/20/2004 -  9/26/2004
9/13/2004 -  9/19/2004
  9/6/2004 -  9/12/2004
8/30/2004 -   9/5/2004
8/23/2004 -  8/29/2004
8/16/2004 -  8/22/2004
  8/9/2004 -  8/15/2004
  8/2/2004 -   8/8/2004
7/26/2004 -   8/1/2004
7/19/2004 -  7/25/2004
7/12/2004 -  7/18/2004
  7/5/2004 -  7/11/2004
6/28/2004 -   7/4/2004
6/21/2004 -  6/27/2004
6/14/2004 -  6/20/2004
  6/7/2004 -  6/13/2004
5/31/2004 -   6/6/2004
5/24/2004 -  5/30/2004
5/17/2004 -  5/23/2004
5/10/2004 -  5/16/2004
  5/3/2004 -   5/9/2004
4/26/2004 -   5/2/2004
4/19/2004 -  4/25/2004
4/12/2004 -  4/18/2004
  4/5/2004 -  4/11/2004
3/29/2004 -   4/4/2004
3/22/2004 -  3/28/2004
3/15/2004 -  3/21/2004
  3/8/2004 -  3/14/2004
  3/1/2004 -   3/7/2004
2/23/2004 -  2/29/2004
2/16/2004 -  2/22/2004
  2/9/2004 -  2/15/2004
  2/2/2004 -   2/8/2004
1/26/2004 -   2/1/2004
1/19/2004 -  1/25/2004
1/12/2004 -  1/18/2004
  1/5/2004 -  1/11/2004
12/29/2003 -   1/4/2004
12/22/2003 - 12/28/2003
12/15/2003 - 12/21/2003
12/8/2003 - 12/14/2003
12/1/2003 -  12/7/2003
11/24/2003 - 11/30/2003
11/17/2003 - 11/23/2003
11/10/2003 - 11/16/2003
11/3/2003 -  11/9/2003
10/27/2003 -  11/2/2003
10/20/2003 - 10/26/2003
10/13/2003 - 10/19/2003
10/6/2003 - 10/12/2003
9/29/2003 -  10/5/2003
9/22/2003 -  9/28/2003
9/15/2003 -  9/21/2003
  9/8/2003 -  9/14/2003
  9/1/2003 -   9/7/2003
8/25/2003 -  8/31/2003
8/18/2003 -  8/24/2003
8/11/2003 -  8/17/2003
  8/4/2003 -  8/10/2003
7/28/2003 -   8/3/2003
7/21/2003 -  7/27/2003
7/14/2003 -  7/20/2003
  7/7/2003 -  7/13/2003
6/30/2003 -   7/6/2003
6/23/2003 -  6/29/2003
6/16/2003 -  6/22/2003
  6/9/2003 -  6/15/2003
  6/2/2003 -   6/8/2003
5/26/2003 -   6/1/2003
5/19/2003 -  5/25/2003
5/12/2003 -  5/18/2003
  5/5/2003 -  5/11/2003
4/28/2003 -   5/4/2003
4/21/2003 -  4/27/2003
4/14/2003 -  4/20/2003
  4/7/2003 -  4/13/2003
3/31/2003 -   4/6/2003
3/24/2003 -  3/30/2003
3/17/2003 -  3/23/2003
3/10/2003 -  3/16/2003
  3/3/2003 -   3/9/2003
2/24/2003 -   3/2/2003
2/17/2003 -  2/23/2003
2/10/2003 -  2/16/2003
  2/3/2003 -   2/9/2003
1/27/2003 -   2/2/2003
1/20/2003 -  1/26/2003
1/13/2003 -  1/19/2003
  1/6/2003 -  1/12/2003
12/30/2002 -   1/5/2003
12/23/2002 - 12/29/2002
12/16/2002 - 12/22/2002
12/9/2002 - 12/15/2002
12/2/2002 -  12/8/2002
11/25/2002 -  12/1/2002
11/18/2002 - 11/24/2002
11/11/2002 - 11/17/2002
11/4/2002 - 11/10/2002
10/28/2002 -  11/3/2002
10/21/2002 - 10/27/2002
10/14/2002 - 10/20/2002
10/7/2002 - 10/13/2002
9/30/2002 -  10/6/2002
9/23/2002 -  9/29/2002
9/16/2002 -  9/22/2002
  9/9/2002 -  9/15/2002
  9/2/2002 -   9/8/2002
8/26/2002 -   9/1/2002
8/19/2002 -  8/25/2002
8/12/2002 -  8/18/2002
  8/5/2002 -  8/11/2002
7/29/2002 -   8/4/2002
7/22/2002 -  7/28/2002
7/15/2002 -  7/21/2002
  7/8/2002 -  7/14/2002
  7/1/2002 -   7/7/2002
6/24/2002 -  6/30/2002
6/17/2002 -  6/23/2002
6/10/2002 -  6/16/2002
  6/3/2002 -   6/9/2002
5/27/2002 -   6/2/2002
5/20/2002 -  5/26/2002
5/13/2002 -  5/19/2002
  5/6/2002 -  5/12/2002
4/29/2002 -   5/5/2002
4/22/2002 -  4/28/2002
4/15/2002 -  4/21/2002
  4/8/2002 -  4/14/2002
  4/1/2002 -   4/7/2002
3/25/2002 -  3/31/2002
3/18/2002 -  3/24/2002
3/11/2002 -  3/17/2002
  3/4/2002 -  3/10/2002
2/25/2002 -   3/3/2002
2/18/2002 -  2/24/2002
2/11/2002 -  2/17/2002
  2/4/2002 -  2/10/2002
1/28/2002 -   2/3/2002
1/21/2002 -  1/27/2002
1/14/2002 -  1/20/2002
  1/7/2002 -  1/13/2002
12/31/2001 -   1/6/2002
12/24/2001 - 12/30/2001
12/17/2001 - 12/23/2001

Friday, December 14, 2007
14:05 - Chocolate Reviews: Lindt Excellence 70%, 85%, Ecuador, Madagascar	(top)
70%: The one that coats is the only one you need. 85%: Use this to illustrate to an alien visitor what "chocolate" tastes like. Ecuador: There's Arriba in there somewhere, behind all the broken glass. Madagascar: Something this sweet should be buying me flowers. In our last episode, we looked at some 85%-class dark chocolates that included Lindt's Excellence 85% bar, one that seems to have achieved critical success that belies its widespread mass-market availability. I thought that this time I should look at the same bar in a different context: alongside Lindt's other three dark bars that you can typically find in candy aisles all over the country. Lindt & Spr�ngli is a pretty big manufacturer, perhaps not to the extent that one could call it "the Hershey's of Europe" (that moniker would probably be better used to describe Barry Callebaut, who owns Brach's)�but certainly they're right up there, with several subsidiaries of their own, including San Francisco's Ghirardelli. They make those little Lindor truffles you see everywhere, and all kinds of flavored bars in the Excellence line. Yet that line doesn't span much of the dark chocolate range, with only four unadulterated dark bars that I know about or could find on their site: blends at 70% and 85% strength, and single-origin bars from Ecuador and Madagascar, at 75% and 65% respectively. Blended chocolates aren't inherently better or worse than single-origins; they have plenty of their own merits, such as the ability to convey a pure and classic "chocolate" flavor, as we already know the 85% is able to do. Some single-origin flavors can be one-note or strident or even not taste anything like "chocolate". Two excellent cases in point are the varietal strains from Ecuador and Madagascar, both highly specialized and recognizable tastes in the spectrum of chocolate, more so even than most other regional varietals I've tried. Perhaps it's for this reason that Lindt chose those two origins for their line, and not sources like Venezuela, the Caribbean islands, or West Africa, like Hershey's does with its "Cacao Reserve" line (they have varietals from Santo Domingo and S�o Tom� as well as Ecuador and Java). Either way, they're both fine choices for presenting unique chocolate flavor variations to the general public, especially with as wide an audience as Lindt commands in the U.S. and world markets. We'll start with the 70%, move up to the 85% to compare it in context with that bar rather than other companies' 85-class bars, then proceed to the Ecuador and Madagascar varietals. The first two blended bars are both very dark, the 85% almost so much as to be blackish-purple. The copy on the back of the 70%'s box says it has a "warm color"; well, maybe if it's sitting next to the 85%, but not to the single-origins, both of which are very light by comparison, the Madagascar in particular boasting a reddish-blond hue that I recognize well from Valrhona's Madagascar plantation bar, Ampamakia. This color comes from the rarer and more delicate Criollo strain of cacao beans, as opposed to the widespread and hardy Forastero strain that makes up the vast bulk of world production despite its much less interesting flavor characteristics. This isn't to say that Forastero beans are completely unsuited to use in great chocolate; far from it. Lindt's blended bars are certainly based on Forastero beans, just really high-grade ones. It's just that Criollos will impart a flavor that's much richer and more complex, with more subtle notes drifting in and out of the palate as it melts. The same level of complexity, however, is also present in the Forastero beans that make up just about every "Ecuador" bar you'll see on the market, because Ecuador's trademark strain of Forastero beans is so different from other Forasteros that it has its own name: Nacional, or more commonly Arriba. Arriba beans have a flavor that's unmistakable once you've tasted it: not necessarily the best flavor (I myself am not a huge fan of it), but definitely a good deal more interesting than the usual one-note song sung by even the best Forastero beans from elsewhere in the world. Now, I'll come clean right off the bat and say that the Lindt 70% is one of my very favorites, and before I even taste it I know what to expect: the longest melt and smoothest finish of anything I've ever tried. This chocolate all liquefies at once in the mouth and turns into a thick, syrupy coating that goes everywhere and sticks�your tongue, your teeth, everywhere. And it stays with you, too. It takes ten minutes before it's all dissolved away, and it can be another half-hour before the flavor is completely gone. Fortunately, it's a great flavor, as tasting it again reiterates. The initial sense is of something tense and a little alarming, like tobacco smoke; but as the melt begins it all resolves into a complex and fruity tapestry of tartness and sweetness and juiciness, hardly bitter at all, and thoroughly enjoyable. By the time you've taken stock of all the different notes that are happening at once, the thing has melted into its characteristic mouthful-o-mud, and now you get to sit back in your chair and patiently wait for it to seep into all the crevices of your teeth and dig itself in. There's far more to it than the Scharffen Berger 70%, which is pale and sugary by comparison; this one has a lot more going for it and is vastly more involving. It's so tasty it's hard for me to move on to the next square; but I must, and I do: a swig of Diet Coke to hasten the natural cleansing of the palate (even though this chocolate's aftertaste somehow makes the Diet Coke taste like coffee), and it's time for our old friend the 85%. Next to the 70%, the bitterness of the darker bar is immediately apparent: its attack is smoother, but it retains that same intensity and angle throughout its melt, which is almost (but not quite) as long as the 70%'s. The flavor profile could hardly be more different: it's pure chocolate, with hardly anything else to distract from it, whereas the 70% was full of wild tartness and fruitiness with surprises every few seconds, like a fruitcake that's more fruit than cake. The 85% is content to revel in its mastery of the "chocolate" flavor and stand smirking on its pedestal of aloof bitterness, not stepping down to meet you halfway with any compromises or peace offerings like fruit baskets with "Friends?" written on a scarf tied to the handle. There's no need. This chocolate is there to be appreciated as-is, and you can like it or lump it. (Personally, I'm in the former camp.) Next we move on to the Ecuador offering. Now, I've got some idea of what an Arriba bar is likely to taste like, having tried the Ecuadorian single-origins from Chocovic, Hershey, Domori, and Hachez; typically it's what I would describe as "dark" and "liqueury", even "medicinal". Most manufacturer labeling describes Arriba flavors as being "floral", though to me maybe that's true only if you're talking about things like orchids that have sat on the table too long. But at least in the case of Lindt, all they seem inclined to say about their Ecuador single-origin is that it's "an aromatic chocolate offering an intense note of cocoa", whatever that means. Perhaps I just haven't had a particularly good Arriba yet; the Hachez I had was so vacuous and unfocused as to be downright unpleasant, and even Domori's tasted to me like suntan lotion. But if it seems like I'm going into this tasting with a bit of trepidation, it's only because I am. Aroma-wise it's certainly forthright; it's probably got the most nose of any of the chocolates here. I don't know that it has much in the way of characteristic Arriba smells, but it's quite pleasant and classically cocoa. Biting into it, though, I'm immediately distracted from any flavor characteristics by the brittle crunchiness of what can only be a stale bar. (The expiration date is 1/31/08.) Fortunately this shattering texture isn't the only notable characteristic, as with the C�te d'Or from last time; once it's crunched down to the melting point, you really get to enjoy some fine and assertive chocolate flavors, with Arriba's characteristic cloying floridity playing only a minor role among other bright and herbal notes. This isn't the somber and brooding Arriba I'm used to (possibly in keeping with how much lighter in color this bar is from most Arribas); it's more carefree and playful, like a satirical comic-opera version of Les Mis�rables put on by the cast of the original in order to keep from going insane. Not all is good, though�like most Arribas I've tried (especially the Ghana/Ecuador/Panama blend from Theo), it's quite astringent, leaving the tongue feeling dried-out and stictiony against your teeth and the back of the throat feeling oddly hot. (The ingredients list "natural flavoring (prune)", alarmingly enough. I didn't taste any prunes, though�which is weird, because a prune flavor is something I've come to expect from Arriba chocolates, particularly the oddball Hachez.) Perhaps it's fitting that the final offering, the Madagascar, is only a 65%�relatively low for a dark chocolate, but not for a Madagascar (the Ampamakia from Valrhona is similarly low-cacao-content). That's just fine with me, because even at that level it's apparent that bitterness wouldn't be this chocolate's finest presentation style anyway. If the Ampamakia is anything to go by, the diversity of the slate of flavors here will be unmatched outside of Club Technochocolate. Unfortunately this bar might have suffered from even more of the languishing-on-a-shelf-at-Fry's than the Ecuador bar; grestigious though it might be, the expiration date is 12/31/07, which probably means I shouldn't expect it to measure up to the other bars texturally or even in taste. But even with that in mind, I have a hard time believing how the melt on this bar works. It crunches up into tiny little fragments, and then rather than those fragments melting into a mouth-coating paste, the whole ball of chocolate bits clumps together into a mushy, amoeboid mass that stubbornly refuses to disintegrate. Only by sticking my tongue into the middle of the ball can I get any sense of the flavor�and when I do, what I taste is mostly sugary sweetness, like an undistinguished marshmallowy Easter bunny or something. There's hardly anything I can do to coax out any additional flavor or get a sense for the distinctive Madagascar notes that I know should be in evidence�if this is a Sambirano cacao, as the Swiss-glish label alludes, I might expect something of a hint of the almost overpowering acidity of Domori's Sambirano; or failing that, there should at least be some of the fascinating tropical-plant notes of Ampamakia. But I'm not getting any of that. Every time I think I'm tasting something interesting, and concentrate harder on it, it dissolves away into mere sugars, leaving me wondering whether I'd tasted anything at all. In the end I'm left feeling like I just ate a sugar cube. Maybe these problems with the Ecuador and the Madagascar can be attributed to the bars' relative staleness; maybe they can't. Certainly seventypercent.com seems to be generally positive about these bars, if not effusive. But for me, I'm just not seeing these bars waving what ought to be much more confidently flying colors, particularly the Madagascar. The Ecuador is better, but not hugely so; neither of them gives me anything like the memorable experience I get from eating the blended 70% or 85% Excellence bars. I think this ought to teach me a lesson: no more bars from supermarket shelves. If I'm going to taste something seriously, I need to get it fresh from chocosphere.com, and try it straight out of the wrapper. But even with that in mind, I don't think even perfect freshness could do much to raise the flavors of these single-origins to the levels the blends had led me to expect. I guess Lindt is leading no charmed life, which just makes me all the more appreciative that the 70% and 85% are so good. Next time I think I'll get some Arribas together and compare them head-to-head. Maybe by that time I'll have found a fresher Lindt to throw into the mix.