g r o t t o 1 1

Peeve Farm
Breeding peeves for show, not just to keep as pets
Brian Tiemann
Silicon Valley-based purveyor of a confusing mixture of Apple punditry and political bile.

btman at grotto11 dot com

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Capitalist Lion
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Tuesday, December 27, 2005
22:12 - Turkey sandwich OF THE GODS

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It's the most perfect possible way to dispense with holiday leftovers. It's very easy, but the steps must be followed exactly, or you'll awaken an undead army that you'll then have to fight off using only your 21st century wits and chainsaw hand.


Start with some seeded, presliced French rolls, like these ones. In fact, it has to be exactly these ones. The seeds are a critical ingredient, so don't make the mistake of grabbing plain old sandwich rolls. I'm pretty sure the preslicing has a positive effect on the taste too.


Apply a thin layer of mayo, and some slices of good assertive cheddar. Note that this will be an open-faced sandwich, so prop the thinner side of the roll up on the rim of the plate to keep it from folding shut.


Thin-slice the turkey. It's very important that the turkey be cold, on the dry side (for flakiness), and freshly cut off a real turkey. Cold cuts won't do at all. It has to be real white-meat turkey from a real bowl of leftovers.


Give some to the dog; he's waiting so patiently.


Arrange the turkey slices on the sandwich. For extra spontaneity points, just sort of pile it on, like the hair-net ladies did in the high school cafeteria line where I developed my long-standing taste for this thing.


Add some sliced black olives...


...And pickles to taste.


Enjoy! (Note: you might have to be me for this last step.)


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© Brian Tiemann