|Tuesday, March 9, 2004
01:05 - No More Mr. Potato Head?
Is this for real? Via Tim Blair, it purports to be a series of off-the-cuff comments from Dick Cheney at the annual Gridiron dinner, which sounds like something I should know more about.
Many people have made noises about Cheney being Bush's biggest detriment for his second term, that he's deadwood and a magnet for criticism over policy and conflicts of interest, and that he should feign a heart attack and let Rudy Giuliani or Condi Rice step in as Veep.
But after seeing this, I'm wondering...
Thank you, President [Al] Hunt, members of the Gridiron . . . at one point during your skits, I had a little scare. I felt a tightness in my chest. I started gasping for air and breathing irregularly. Then I realized it's called laughing. . . .
Lots of familiar faces here tonight. I always feel a genuine bond whenever I see Senator Clinton. She's the only person who's the center of more conspiracy theories than I am.
. . .
Here's an unsigned question. "Mr. Vice President, don't you think it's time to step down and let someone else add new energy and vitality to the ticket?"
No . . . I don't. And Rudy [Guiliani], you need to do a better job disguising your handwriting.
Oh . . . and Rudy has a follow up. "How can you be so sure you'll be on the ticket?"
Because the CIA told me so! . . .
. . .
Dave Broder: "How would you accurately describe your role in this administration? Be honest."
I would say that I am a dark, insidious force pushing Bush toward war and confrontation. . . .
There's more. Even if this is just a spoof, it's a bloody good one.
But if it's not, we'd better make sure to get that security alert level down so Cheney can make more public appearances. Him, Bush, and Rumsfeld, up on stage with a brick wall behind them, a few bottles of Calistoga, and a 10:00 slot on Comedy Central...